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Michael Allan Charles

Unbelievable Stories from Asia

9/18/2014

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I have been a principal in a number of countries in Asia and unless you were in my office with me,  you would think I was making up most of these stories but sadly they are all true. Some of them inspired some scenes in my novel It All Started in Mandalay which you may recognize when you read my book. 

Since I was a principal in Bangkok for a number of years I learned a number of words in Thai, but words only, not tones. There are six tones in Thai and if you go up instead of down or sideways the word has a totally different meaning. When I became a principal in Singapore, a Thai family wanted their son to gain entrance to my school. We had every intention of accepting him but I wanted him to know that he was going to have to work hard because he had very little English. I looked at him sternly and told him if we let him into the school he was going to have to "thangann" "thangann" "thangann" which I thought meant he was going to have to work and work and then work some more! I was so proud of myself to be able to speak Thai to him. When I saw his mother turning red and his aunt stifling a huge laugh I knew I said something wrong. I apparently was telling him if he was accepted into the school he would have to have sex, have sex, have sex. Hey, he couldn't wait to start.

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Talking about sex, one time in Thailand, one of my teachers went to one of the red light districts and took home what he thought was a beautiful woman. When he later found out she was not a woman, he threw her out a window in his apartment which was a few floors up. As the principal of the school, I was called to the police station in the middle of the night to bail him out. Not sure if any principal in Canada ever had to do that!

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Another time a woman was berating me in Thai about how we were treating her daughter. I politely disagreed with what she was saying and told her so. She told me at the end that I simply did not understand her. I responded I understood her perfectly but just disagreed. Most times I had a translator and in Vietnam I remember telling the parents I was going to do away with the 90 minute lunch hour nap which was a tradition in Vietnam since the French period of colonization. The parents did not respond at all, and when I asked the translator later why there was no reaction, he told me he could not repeat what I had said. You mean you did not have the words for sleeping or nap, and he responded no, he just could not bring himself to say it. He told e he did not have the nerve to say such a thing!!!

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    Michael Allan Charles is the first time author of It All Started In Mandalay

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